Coping with Grief & Loneliness Over the Holidays

Handling grief or loss over the holidays by Billy Graham Evangelistic Association (iStock photo)

"This is my comfort in my affliction, for Your word revives me" (Ps. 119:50, MEV).

Christmas isn't a joyful season for everybody. Grief—whether from loss, loneliness or both—crescendos around this time of year for many, and the deep, emotional pain can seem like almost too much to bear.

Isaiah 53:4 states, "Surely He has borne our griefs and carried our sorrows." Jesus carries as much of the burden as we let Him. But in addition to falling into our Savior's loving arms, here are five suggestions to ease your personal Christmas blues or empower you to help someone else dealing with grief and loneliness:

1. Be kind to yourself. Billy Graham likens the death of a loved one to major surgery. But that can also be true regarding the death of a relationship, say a divorce. Healing from any medical operation takes time, and so does finding a new way of life after losing someone close. Leave the decorations in the attic this year if you need to. Find another family member to host Christmas dinner. Most importantly, perhaps, allow yourself to cry—or even scream—out to God as you process. David did in Psalm 61:2. Jesus wept when his friend Lazarus died (John 11:1-44). Your tears aren't a sign of faithlessness. They're a natural and necessary response to your loss. Let God heal you (Matthew 11:28).

2. Adjust your expectations. Anticipate Christmas will be different without your loved one and be proactive about your emotional health. Don't live in fear of your emotions, but take stock of your heart, especially before logging onto Facebook or other social media. Feelings of loneliness have a way of intensifying when you're bombarded by social media posts of your friends apparently having a grand time. Sign off for now if you need to.

If you find yourself in the comforter role this Christmas, keep your words washed in love and extend grace. Whether Uncle John has been gone for seven days, seven months or seven years, your aunt still misses him. Don't wonder (especially aloud) how she can still be sad after all these years. "How are you holding up?" is typically a safe question when talking with someone who has experienced loss. Check out the Sharing Hope in Crisis course from the Billy Graham Rapid Response Team if you're interested in in-depth training for these sensitive situations.

3. Reach out. Sometimes the best way to lift your spirit is by helping someone else. Isolation turns your focus inward. Instead, volunteer with a local church, serve dinner to the homeless or walk your elderly neighbor's dog. Do something to serve. Additionally, if you're aching to have Christmas dinner with others, ask to join a  family member, friend or someone in your church. Remember, it's never a bad idea to offer to bring a dish, supplies or help with cleanup. Alternatively, if you know someone dealing with grief or loneliness, do your part. Give the gift of your time (Galatians 6:2).

4. Say something. Memories linger in your loved ones' absence. Remember the funny stories. Share them. Laugh and cry with your family members and friends as you reminisce. Or don't. If there aren't good memories or it's just too soon, consider finding new traditions and ways to focus forward.  If you're on the outside looking in, don't feel compelled to change the subject if someone mourning brings up good memories about the deceased. Operate cautiously and with sensitivity but above all else be a good listener and don't mind the tears. Memories are precious gifts from God, and they are one of the few ways a loved one's legacy lives on.

5. Cling to the promises of God. Especially when you don't feel like it. Consider John 14:18, which says: "No, I will not abandon you or leave you as orphans in the storm—I will come to you." You might feel forgotten by people, but you aren't forgotten by our heavenly Father. God is here. He sees you grieving. He wants to comfort you. Remind others of that truth. If you aren't familiar with His promises, start by finding peace with God.

Some quotes from Billy Graham on grief:

  • "With Christ as your Savior and constant Companion, you, although alone, need never be lonely."
  • When we grieve over someone who has died in Christ, we are sorrowing not for them but for ourselves. Our grief isn't a sign of weak faith, but of great love."
  • "It is our Lazarus tomb dark and foreboding and drenched with bitter tears, but it is there that we meet our Lord who brings life from death and gladness from the very tomb of bereavement. Christ can give rest in the midst of sorrow."
  • "If there is something we need more than anything else during grief, it is a friend who stands with us, who doesn't leave us. Jesus is that friend."

For the original article, visit billygraham.org.

 

Let Christmas Be Complicated

We often overlook the tragic backdrop to Jesus' birth. (Photo: ECWA Archive)

I have always loved the color gray. All my favorite hoodies, sweatpants, and T-shirts are gray. One Christmas shopping trip, my fashion-savvy mother tried to get me to “please, pick some color besides gray—something bright!” As much as I try to branch out, there is something inexplicably comfortable and comforting about the color. I feel at home in it.

Much later, the world itself seemed to turn gray. After six months of struggling with depression and self-hatred in a country that wasn’t my own, I returned home to find my nicely packaged view of how the world works shattered. Gone was the God who did things “for a reason,” the God who, if he called you to a place, would give you a deep contentment, even if circumstances were difficult.

My relationship with God went through a fundamental shift then, and the way I see the world has never been the same. As I struggle off and on with depression, I live through seasons of lighter and darker shades of gray. Instead of rose-colored glasses, I see the world through a dimming and dulling filter.

But even as the world has turned gray, it has also become more complex. It is in some ways too simple to say that I’ve gone from seeing the world as “black and white” to seeing it as gray. Of course, as a Christian, I affirm that some things are black and white; there is both real evil and real good in the world. But beyond that, evil and good can become so entangled in this time-between-times that it can be difficult to see where one ends and the other begins. Seeing the world through the lens of Scripture demands we recognize this shades-of-gray complexity of our world.

The human minds craves simplicity. We tend to simplify otherwise complex situations so that solutions are clear to us. Whether it’s terrorist attacks in Paris or protests against racism on college campuses, we find comfort knowing what the response ought to be, not to mention why it happened in the first place. We simply need more air strikes and more surveillance. We need to stop accepting refugees. We need less war, not more. We need to stop coddling students with political correctness.

I see this simplification happen on a personal level too, with well-intended attempts to explain or answer our suffering. Think of the clichés: God doesn’t give us more than we can handle. Everything happens for a reason. It was just her time. Behind these sentiments, we find the good desire to affirm that God loves us and has our best interests at heart. But too often such simplifications—of individual suffering or suffering on a larger scale—belie our need to control the narrative. If we can oversimplify the situation, then we can understand it and protect ourselves. But in a world tainted by sin, circumstances are rarely that straightforward, as we learn from Scripture itself.

Many have recently invoked Joseph, Mary, and Jesus in their flight to Egypt as “Middle Eastern refugees,” in parallel to present-day refugees. And yet, their story—even in the pages of the New Testament—isn’t an isolated account of a happy-ending journey. What about the other babies and families of Matthew 2, those left behind to suffer the consequences of King Herod’s lust for power? What’s the reason for that? It is easy to see why this part of the story is often left out of our Advent retellings. In the midst of the joy and hope surrounding Jesus’ birth, we find the insertion of one of the most brutal acts depicted in the New Testament.

This detail doesn’t get included as a casual aside. Matthew tells us twice that Herod is fulfilling prophecy. First, Jesus’ family flees to Egypt, having been warned of the danger. This fulfills Hosea 11:1, “Out of Egypt I called my son.” Second—and even more striking—is the “fulfillment” of the words of Jeremiah:

A voice was heard in Ramah,
Weeping and great mourning,
Rachel weeping for her children;
And she refused to be comforted,
Because they were no more.

Imagine one of those Jewish mothers of Bethlehem. Her one-year-old son, having made it through those first few critical months of life, has been taken by her own king, his life snuffed out in the offhand chance that he might pose a threat. And she was powerless to stop it. She did not have the benefit of the warning that Joseph received. Perhaps she didn’t have the means to flee even if she had been warned. Now imagine had she been told that her suffering and loss fulfilled a prophecy, that it’s part and parcel of the sending of God’s Anointed One, part of God’s “plan.” It rings a bit hollow, doesn’t it?

The questions abound: What about Herod? Ultimately, his acts fulfill the prophecies. Or do they? Just because this is the way it happened, is this the way it had to happen? Could God have fulfilled the prophecies in another way? Let’s put it even more strongly: Did God want those babies to die? Is Matthew implying he did? Like any time we try to grapple with the hows and whys of God’s plan, these are tough questions. There aren’t easy answers. And perhaps that is precisely the point.

Too often we read Scripture expecting nice, neat packages. I suspect this is why some Christians struggle with the Old Testament, where it’s harder to grasp the “whys” behind the tough stories. But Scripture mirrors the complexity of the human situation it is meant to address. And Scripture often whispers, even when we would prefer that it shout.

This Advent and Christmas, I am challenging myself to pay attention to the silences of Scripture—the places where Scripture invites us to ask questions, to wrestle with the text, to wrestle with God, as Jacob did. In the shades of gray, I can listen for the Spirit to whisper in the details I might otherwise overlook.

John Calvin spoke of Scripture as “spectacles” that teach us to see God and the world rightly. As we allow Scripture to shape our vision, we may find that we no longer need the easy answers, the clichéd responses, the knee-jerk reactions. We may find ourselves able to sit and be silent.

Once upon a time, not far from Bethlehem, another prophecy was fulfilled: a strong empire executed a lowly criminal, with the religious leaders cheering them along the way. Many in that time thought they could see the distinctions between black and white. It took a resurrection to open their eyes. We too live in a time when “we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror.” Let us pray for eyes to see the world in all its complexity…until that time when “we shall see face to face” (1 Cor. 13:12).

Mandy Rodgers-Gates is a Th.D. candidate at Duke Divinity School and a Wheaton College graduate. She wrote one of the winning posts in Her.meneutics' writing contest this summer.

10 Hallmark Christmas Movies Classics

10 great Christmas classics you have to watch this season. (image | fanpap, purple Merry Christmas)
 
It's Christmas time! Has Christmas season really started if the music isn't blasting and you're not planning your nightly Christmas movie marathon? – NO! No need to be embarrassed – it's everyone's guilty pleasure. Hallmark Christmas movies suck you in, and since the season of eggnog and mistletoe has officially begun, here's a list of the best Hallmark movies.
 
1. Matchmaker Santa
Matchmaker Santa
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
This is one of the best Christmas romance movies. Feeling caught between her boyfriend, and her boyfriend's best friend Dean, Melanie has a big choice to make – but not without the help of our favorite jolly friends!

2. Let It Snow
Let It Snow
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Stephanie finds both spirit in the Christmas season and romance; putting her in a hard place with some tough decisions. (Also – who doesn't love a good DJ Tanner throwback?)

3. Northpole
Northpole
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
The North Pole is worried that maybe people are too stressed out to enjoy the spirit of Christmas. Finding the magic in Christmas might be the solution.

4. The Nine Lives of Christmas
The Nine Lives of Christmas
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Will Cat Ambrose change Zachary's outlook on Christmas time and finding true love?

5. Christmas Ornament
Christmas Ornament
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Grieving the loss of her late husband, Kathy decides to stop her Christmas traditions, only to find out Christmas spirit alone will bring in a special someone that changes her outlook.

6. Debbie Macomber's : Mr.Miracle
Debbie Macomber's : Mr.Miracle
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Angel Harry comes to Earth to help a woman named Addie. He's unwilling to listen to advice, and with good intentions he meddles with lives. Will he be able to help Addie open up?

7. Christmas Under Wraps
Christmas Under Wraps
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
When Lauren doesn't get the position she wanted, she ends up moving to Alaska. Unexpectedly, she falls in love only to learn that the town is hiding a pretty big secret.

8. Christmas with Holly
Christmas with Holly
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
The owner of a toy store falls in love with a man caring for his niece, who refuses to talk after the death of her mother. This Christmas they will find the true meaning of family will.

9. November Christmas
November Christmas
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Eight-year-old Emily is struggling with Cancer and will not be able to do Christmas this year, so the wonderful community has an idea to make this Christmas extra special.

10. One Christmas Eve
One Christmas Eve
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Everything on Christmas CAN and WILL go wrong for one family – will they be able to combat it with Christmas Cheer?
 
If you're anything like me, you'll be done binge-watching these in a week! So in that case, tune into Hallmark for tons of new Christmas classics.
 
Movies review by Kylie Stewart. You may check out the original review at The Odyssey Online.  You can tweet Kylie online. Sea foam green, frequent coffee runs, and a whole lot of Jesus in my life.
 

Five Errors to Drop from Your Christmas Sermon

If you want to help people see Christmas with fresh eyes, start by dropping these familiar fallacies.(Abraham Bloemaert / Wikimedia Commons.The adoration of the Magi)

Pastors, preachers, and Bible teachers: Have you thought about your Christmas sermon or lesson yet? If you want to help people celebrate Christmas this year (and every year) in keeping with established facts—not later legends, traditions, or popular imaginations—start by avoiding these common mistakes.

1. Don’t add details that aren’t in the text.

This might seem obvious but bears repeating because it happens so often. The massive annual proliferation of Christmas cards, nativity scenes, and TV specials perpetuates these added details and gives the impression that they are facts.

The infancy narratives in the Gospels lack many of the details that have been fabricated in subsequent centuries. For example, they don’t tell us about the nature of the stable (cave, open-air, wood, etc.); whether there even was a stable; whether or not there were animals nearby; or the number of wise men. These magoi (not kings and not necessarily three in number) almost certainly didn’t arrive on the night of the birth as most manger scenes depict. And a star wouldn’t have been suspended right above the roofline. With no mention of a stable, the manger could have been in the open air, in an animal pen near the house, in a small cave, or in the area of a house used for animals.

The texts don’t mention Mary and/or Joseph riding on a donkey. It is equally plausible—if not more so—that they walked the entire way from Nazareth to Bethlehem (70–80 miles; at least 3 days of steady walking). The idea of Mary riding a donkey stems from a second-century apocryphal work (Protoevangelium of James, chap. 17). Actually, it wouldn’t have been unreasonable for a pregnant teenager in antiquity with an active lifestyle to walk such a journey.

Despite what we see in some Christmas pageants, there is no mention of an innkeeper (whether mean and coldhearted or regretful for the lack of space available); Luke simply mentions that there was no room in the kataluma (Luke 2:7). The kataluma was not a formal professional inn with an innkeeper but could point to either a public covered shelter (as in the Greek translation of Ex. 4:24) or to the guest room in a personal home (as in Luke 22:11).

It is important for us to stick with established facts when preaching and teaching. There is, of course, nothing wrong with the use of historical imagination. But it is important to maintain a clear distinction between what we actually know happened and imaginative reconstructions of how events might have taken place. Christianity is rooted in historical fact. This is as true for Jesus’ birth as it is true for the crucifixion and resurrection.

2. Don’t supply spiritual explanations for cultural practices to make them sound biblical.

We love to find—or even invent—spiritual reasons for various cultural practices related to Christmas. For example, we give gifts to one other to remind ourselves of God’s great gift of Jesus to the world or of the gifts of the wise men to Jesus. That may sound nice, but is it biblical? Or do we really give gifts because that’s what our parents did and what everyone else we know does (except the Jehovah’s Witnesses, diehard secularists, and some religious purists)? What kind of parent would you be if you didn’t give your child a Christmas present (or, in many cases, a whole roomful of them)? Or, just imagine, if you didn’t celebrate Christmas at all (like the Puritans)? Very little is intrinsically spiritual or biblical about these kinds of expectations. They’re almost entirely cultural. That doesn’t make them necessarily wrong, but we shouldn’t invent biblical rationales to justify them.

Examples abound. What does the decoration of an evergreen tree have to do with Jesus’ coming to earth to rescue God’s creation? We may tell ourselves it’s a symbol of everlasting life because it’s evergreen but is that really the reason to set up a Christmas tree each year? Similarly, we may point to candles as a symbol of Jesus being the light of the world, holly as a symbol of the crown of thorns that was placed upon Jesus’ head, the color red as a symbol of Jesus’ blood shed on the cross, the yule log as a symbol of the cross, mistletoe as a symbol of reconciliation, and bells as a symbol for ringing out the good news. Even if some of these associations and symbols are ancient, they don’t explain why we should necessarily incorporate them in our Christmas celebrations today. If we’re honest, we have to admit that we celebrate Christmas the way we do primarily because of our own cultural traditions, even though there’s little real connection between these traditions and the biblical accounts of Jesus’ actual coming to this earth as a baby.

The danger of infusing spiritual rationales into cultural practices is also seen in some of the Christmas songs we sing at church during the month of December. The most flagrant violation might be “O Christmas Tree.” You have to search hard through the stanzas of this hymn to find anything related to Jesus. We should be uncomfortable singing this carol in a gathered group of Christians because it’s basically a song paying homage to a tree. Just because the song has been culturally or traditionally associated with Christmas doesn’t mean we should incorporate it into our Christian Christmas celebrations.

The main danger here is that we present cultural practices as if they carry biblical weight or authority. Obscuring the line between cultural practice and biblical teaching is not only unhelpful and confusing, but also potentially harmful to our faith. When we no longer distinguish what’s biblical from what’s cultural, we run the risk of accepting and propagating syncretistic, hodgepodge ideas that have no biblical basis. Our faith is no longer based in truth but, at least in part, on myths and legends.

There is no need, of course, to abandon all these cultural practices in our family celebrations. We should simply maintain and communicate a clear distinction between the aspects of our Christmas celebration that are inherited from the culture and those that are clearly grounded in Scripture.

3. Don’t be embarrassed by the Jewishness of passages related to Jesus’ coming.

The first chapter of Luke includes two lengthy hymns that have traditionally been called the Magnificat (Mary’s song in Luke 1:46–56) and the Benedictus (Zechariah’s song in Luke 1:67–79). The titles come from the first word of these hymns in Latin. These passages—or at least parts of them—are at times neglected because they are rather lengthy and express Jewish hopes in God’s salvation without a clear indication of what that salvation would look like. This deliverance, as we know it in retrospect, comes in the form of Jesus’ death and resurrection, the expansion of the gospel beyond Israel to the Gentiles, and Jesus’ return at the end of time.

The Magnificat celebrates how God, through Mary’s child, will restore and help Israel while opposing her enemies and oppressors. The Benedictus describes John the Baptist’s role in relation to Jesus, the main figure in the fulfillment of God’s plan to restore Israel. The hymn praises God’s actions of visiting and redeeming his people by raising up the Davidic Messiah to deliver his people, all in fulfillment of his promises to Abraham and to his people through the Old Testament prophets. This deliverance will enable God’s people to serve God without fear and in righteousness forever.

Perhaps these hymns are at times neglected in our Christmas sermons because they’re not “Christian” enough. This neglect, however, comes at a serious loss. Both hymns describe the salvation that will result from Jesus’ coming to earth. During his first coming, he decisively dealt with his people’s sin, thus fulfilling passages such as Micah 7:18–20. We’re still waiting for his second coming, when he will set things right in every way—politically, economically, socially, and spiritually—once and for all. We are still waiting for the full and final fulfillment of the declarations made in the Magnificat and Benedictus. Both hymns are also powerful examples of how to praise God by focusing both on his attributes—his power, holiness, and mercy—and his actions in fulfilling his ancient promises to his people in and through the birth of Jesus the Messiah.

The Christian faith is rooted inextricably and inexorably in the Jewish faith. This is why even Luke, a Gentile, presents Jesus’ coming in terms of Old Testament fulfillment (Luke 1:1). Like Matthew, who wrote his Gospel primarily to Jews, Luke presents Jesus’ coming in a thoroughly Jewish cast. If we fail to see our Christian faith rooted in God’s dealings with his people Israel long ago, it will likely remain shallow and leave us with a truncated gospel and canon, not to mention an inadequate understanding of who Jesus is and why he came.

4. Don’t be swayed by dubious challenges to the biblical witness to Jesus’ birth.

Both birth narratives in Scripture are replete with manifestations of supernatural events surrounding the Virgin Birth: angelic appearances, dreams, visions, prophecies made regarding Jesus, Elizabeth conceiving past the age of childbearing, Zechariah losing his speech, the circumstances surrounding the naming of both John and Jesus, the relationship between the two births, and so on. Matthew, for example, goes out of his way to make clear that Mary was Jesus’ mother, but that Joseph was not his real father. After a long string of references to men “fathering” a son, Matthew concludes his genealogy with reference to “Joseph the husband of Mary, of whom Jesus was born, who is called Christ” (Matthew 1:16, italics added), indicating that Joseph was not Jesus’ real father. Jesus was conceived by the Holy Spirit in Mary’s womb.

So let’s not be intimidated by critical objections to the Virgin Birth or other supernatural aspects of the Christmas story. When you read about authors such as Reza Aslan claiming that stories about Jesus’ birth and childhood are “conspicuously absent” from the earliest New Testament writings—such as Paul’s letters and Mark’s Gospel—and that the early Christians filled in the gaps to align Jesus’s life with various Old Testament prophecies, including those related to his birth, don’t be alarmed. According to Aslan, the early Christians concocted the myth of Jesus’ birth in Bethlehem in order “to get Jesus’s parents to Bethlehem so he could be born in the same city as David.” Others, such as Andrew Lincoln, deny the historicity of the Virgin Birth on similar grounds. We can’t respond in detail here, though we’ve done so elsewhere. In short, these kinds of arguments reflect misguided attempts to drain the biblical birth narratives of their transcendent elements by using critical reasoning in order to reinterpret supernatural occurrences and to rewrite the narratives in purely naturalistic terms.

On the one hand, as already mentioned, let’s be careful ourselves not to add extraneous details—though driven by tradition, not critical reasoning. Let’s be adamant in defending the reliability of the biblical witness to the supernatural nature of Jesus’ birth, which was unlike any other in human history. The Bible is unequivocal, and careful historical research certainly allows for the fact that it took a miracle—in fact, a whole string of miracles—to save us. That is nothing to be embarrassed or intimidated about.

5. Don’t get bogged down in trivia and miss the true significance of Jesus’ birth.

Scholars continue to debate questions such as the year of Jesus’s birth, and whether or not Jesus was born on December 25. They debate the historicity of Quirinius’s census, the year of Herod the Great’s death, the phenomena surrounding Jesus’ birth—the star of Bethlehem—and a host of related chronological and other issues. They also debate the possible pagan origins of Christmas, such as whether it provided a functional substitute for the Roman Saturnalia, and, as mentioned, the emergence of various other traditions associated with our celebration of Christmas. All of these are interesting questions worth exploring, but don’t dwell unduly on such peripheral issues. Instead, focus on the central message of Jesus’ first coming, on the biblical story of the Incarnation.

Who was Jesus, and why did he come? John’s Gospel roots Jesus’ origins in eternity past, as the Word who was in the beginning with God and was himself the agent of creation. According to John, in Jesus, God visited the world he had made, but his own did not receive him (1:11). How tragic! How inexcusable! That Word, John tells us, became flesh in Jesus, or, as John puts it, “pitched his tent” among us (1:14). In his three and a half years of ministry, Jesus trained the twelve disciples and others to carry on his mission, to take the gospel of salvation to the ends of the earth. Then, he died for us on the cross to pay for our sins and to reconcile us to God. Our broken relationship with God was mended. Those who trust in him enjoy deep spiritual fulfillment and continual connection with him already in the here and now and will do so for all eternity.

That’s worth celebrating, at Christmas and throughout the year, in joyful song and in a life dedicated to the glory of God in the highest of which the angels sang that starry night over two millennia ago.

Andreas Köstenberger is Senior Research Professor of New Testament and Biblical Theology at Southeastern Baptist Theological Seminary in Wake Forest, North Carolina. Alex Stewart is Academic Dean and Assistant Professor of New Testament Language and Literature at Tyndale Theological Seminary in Badhoevedorp, The Netherlands. They co-authored The First Days of Jesus: The Story of the Incarnation (Crossway, 2015).

 

Love: God’s Most Important Requirement For the Year 2016

Can love create a necessary and sufficient condition resulting into having the kingdom of God (as our inheritance)? (Photo | EMS OF ECWA Widows Seminar)

The idea of cause and effect is very important to all of us.  We want to know if the action of X has brought about what happens to Y.  In this case, we want to know if the action is a necessary cause for what happens to Y.  If it is not, could it be a contributory cause?  We may also want to know if it is a sufficient cause or not, because something can be necessary and not be sufficient to create the condition for something to happen.  For an example, if your car is not of the electric type, you must have gasoline in it before it can start.  Gasoline is very much necessary but by itself is not sufficient for your car to start.  Other things must contribute to that condition. We need something that is both necessary and sufficient to bring about something.  For a student to graduate with a bachelor degree in sociology, one necessary thing he or she has to do is to declare for a major in that discipline.  However, declaring a major does not create a sufficient condition for graduation.  Something can be necessary but may not be sufficient to get us what we want.  Just one academic core requirement not fulfilled by student can prevent that student from graduating, even if he exceeds the total number of credit hours for graduation.  Love for all people is the most powerful requirement that God wants us to fulfill in the year 2016.

Christianity has many requirements for its adherents, including the fulfillment of the Ten Commandments.  While these requirements are necessary, they cannot qualify us for the inheritance of God’s kingdom. Our good works cannot give us eternal life.  Faith without work is empty or nothing.  Thus our good deeds may be necessary but not sufficient.  Love satisfies both conditions (necessary and sufficient).   Logic explains a necessary cause as a condition that must be present if a particular effect is to occur.  This is different from the explanation for a sufficient condition, that is, one thing by itself bringing about an effect.  This is what love is to the kingdom of God.  Love conquers it all!  No amount of “good” works or religious activities will make us inherit the kingdom of God.  We are discussing the relationship between two things in which one is claimed to affect the other.  The issue here is about the relationship between having love and inheriting the kingdom of God. 

The question is asked, “Can love create a necessary and sufficient condition resulting into having the kingdom of God (as our inheritance)?  Most people will definitely say, “Yes.”   John 3:16, a most quoted Bible verse in evangelism, answers the question in the affirmative as Jesus said, “For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son, that whosoever believes in him shall not perish but have everlasting life.”  Love is the answer.

A few people’s encounters with Jesus explain how important love is to the kingdom of God.  Without it, there is no Christian life.  No eternal life.  No kingdom.  He who knows no love does not know God because God is love.  In other words, to know God is to love.  At the birth of Jesus Christ angels celebrated with the world as they sang, “Glory be to God in the highest, and on earth peace to men on whom his favor rests” (St. Luke 2:14).  It is God’s love that we are celebrating at Christmas.  It is sad for anyone who doesn’t have it.  Human beings must make every effort to find the truth.  When they find it, they find the truth, Jesus the prince of peace.  A Bible teacher in his imaginative power told the story in a different way:

Once upon a time God said that the world must know the truth about his love.  So, from His throne He cast the Truth down into the world.  Upon landing, the Truth scattered into uncountable fragments.  God asked human beings to search for the pieces and fragments. 

Jesus came and claimed to be the Truth, the Way and the Life and that no one comes to the Father except through him.  His body was broken and his blood shed for us that we ay find the truth of God’s love. Jesus brings to us love, peace, and joy.  That love gives life and it is required that we love as Christ loves us.  The mistake, in fact, an error of reasoning that is common today is to believe that one can have joy without having love and peace.  One cannot have joy until one has love and what follows is peace.  So, to have joy, we must have God, the Giver of love and peace.  Who brings down that peace?  Jesus, who said, “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you.  I do not give to you as the world gives” (St. John 14:27).    You must have seen some people around   you who would like to have joy but without love, and of course, without peace.  They are so screwed up as to believe that they can steal someone’s joy or peace and make it their own in order to have joy.  They believe that what they have stolen can give them joy.  The one who steals from the other has no love and peace that should have come from Jesus the prince of peace.  Jesus said, “Watch out!  Be on your guard against all kinds of greed; a man’s life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions” (St. Luke 12:15).  God’s love gives peace and He asks us for that love.

Prophet Micah proclaimed what God wanted, “He has shown you, O mortal, what is good.  And what does the Lord require of you?  To act justly and to love mercy and walk humbly with your God” (6:8).  Acting justly, showing acts of mercy and walking humbly with God means nothing if one does not love God.  In fact, it is the love of God that makes one have mercy and walk humbly with God.  Today many people engage with works of mercy but in some cases self is at the center; ungodly motives are involved.  God called Moses, “my humble servant,” because all that Moses did as a leader for Israel did not arise from ulterior motives.  They were all for God and His kingdom.  God asks that we show love in the year 2016.  If we are truly God’s people, loving becomes a lifestyle.  We love not because of anything but because God loves us first and to whom much is given much is expected.

The Ten Commandments are reduced to one Law.  This is the Law of love and life that has been God’s standard for communities.  The laws were written originally on two slates.  The commandments are in two parts.  The first part deals with our relationship with God and the second deals with our relationship with one another.  It is love and not laws that make the relationship positive.  It is a covenant of love.  Covenant relationship between husband and wife cannot work if there is no love.  Man’s inhumanity to man that has been on the increase today is as a result of not having love.  Political injustice, war, terrorism, violence, torture, ethnic cleansing, women and children trafficking, rape, jealousy, armed robbery, and the likes, come upon us as a result of the absence of love in our human society.  The African Methodist Episcopal (A.M.E.) has captured the truth of love being the binding agent for God and human beings.  The motto says, “God our Father, Christ our Redeemer, the Holy Spirit our Comforter, humankind our family.”  God created humankind as a family.  This religious motto brings the divine community to bear upon the human community and all is made possible by love.

Conclusion:  What does God ask of us in the year 2016? It is Christian Love for all people.  Jesus said, “A new commandment I give you:  Love one another.  As I have loved you, so you must love one another.  By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another” (St. John 13:34).  The greatest commandment for 2016 for all human beings is this:  Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.  The second is this:  Love your neighbor as yourself.  There is no commandment greater than this” (St. Mark 12:30-31).  Show your love for God in the year 2016 and thereafter.  May God give you the spirit and the power to show your love for Him all the days of your life and you will find goodness and mercy pursuing you all the time.

Have a blessed Christmas and a happy new year!

Rev. Dr. Daniel Adebayo Iselaiye has been educator for most of his adult life. Some of his religious activities include sporadic teaching/preaching engagements at several Colleges and Universities across the U.S.. He is now associate professor of religion and philosophy; and  the Chairman of ECWA USA DCC. You can reach him via email

 

Giving this Holiday Season

Let the Scriptures, and the Holy Spirit, be your guide in giving this holiday season and beyond (image:St Leodegar's Church).

November and December are both months filled with the spirit of giving. We give not to get anything in return, but because Jesus gave his life for us.

Here are 20 Bible verses to chew on during this wonderful season.

1. Deuteronomy 15:10 – "Give generously to him and do so without a grudging heart; then because of this the Lord your God will bless you in all your work and in everything you put your hand to."

2. Deuteronomy 16:17 – "Every man shall give as he is able, according to the blessing of the LORD your God which He has given you."

3. Proverbs 21:26 – "The righteous gives and does not hold back."

4. Proverbs 3:27 – "Do not withhold good from those to whom it is due, when it is in your power to do it."

5. Proverbs 11:24-25 – "There is one who scatters, and yet increases all the more, and there is one who withholds what is justly due, and yet it results only in want. The generous man will be prosperous, and he who waters will himself be watered."

6. 1 Chronicles 29:9 – "Then the people rejoiced because they had offered so willingly, for they made their offering to the Lord with a whole heart, and King David also rejoiced greatly."

7. Proverbs 22:9 – "He who is generous will be blessed, for he gives some of his food to the poor."

8. Proverbs 28:27 – "He who gives to the poor will never want, but he who shuts his eyes will have many curses."

9. Malachi 3:10 – "'Bring the whole tithe into the storehouse, so that there may be food in My house, and test Me now in this,' says the Lord of hosts, 'if I will not open for you the windows of heaven and pour out for you a blessing until it overflows.'"

10. Matthew 6:3-4 – "But when you give to the poor, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing, so that your giving will be in secret; and your Father who sees what is done in secret will reward you."

11. Mark 12:41-44 – "And He sat down opposite the treasury, and began observing how the people were putting money into the treasury; and many rich people were putting in large sums. A poor widow came and put in two small copper coins, which amount to a cent. Calling His disciples to Him, He said to them, 'Truly I say to you, this poor widow put in more than all the contributors to the treasury; for they all put in out of their surplus, but she, out of her poverty, put in all she owned, all she had to live on.'"

12. Luke 3:11 – "And he would answer and say to them, 'The man who has two tunics is to share with him who has none; and he who has food is to do likewise.'"

13. Luke 6:30 – "Give to everyone who asks of you, and whoever takes away what is yours, do not demand it back."

14. 2 Corinthians 9:6-8 – "Now this I say, he who sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and he who sows bountifully will also reap bountifully. Each one must do just as he has purposed in his heart, not grudgingly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver. And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that always having all sufficiency in everything, you may have an abundance for every good deed."

15. Luke 6:38 – "Give, and it will be given to you. They will pour into your lap a good measure, pressed down, shaken together, and running over. For by your standard of measure it will be measured to you in return."

16. John 3:16 – "For God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten son, that whosoever believes in Him wouldn't perish, but would have eternal life."

17. Acts 20:35 – "In everything I showed you that by working hard in this manner you must help the weak and remember the words of the Lord Jesus, that He Himself said, 'It is more blessed to give than to receive.'"

18. Romans 12:8 – "Or he who exhorts, in his exhortation; he who gives, with liberality; he who leads, with diligence; he who shows mercy, with cheerfulness."

19. James 2:15-16 – "If a brother or sister is without clothing and in need of daily food, and one of you says to them, 'Go in peace, be warmed and be filled,' and yet you do not give them what is necessary for their body, what use is that?"

20. 2 Corinthians 9:10 – "Now He who supplies seed to the sower and bread for food will supply and multiply your seed for sowing and increase the harvest of your righteousness."

Jarrid Wilson is a husband Juli, dad To Finch, pastor, author, blogger and founder of Cause Roast. He's helping people live a better story. For the original article, visit jarridwilson.com.

 

Place Jesus Back In The Manger. Celebrate Advent This Christmas Season.

There is no better time of the year to celebrate Advent than now. Walk through Advent with your loved ones.

Growing up, I loved Christmas season. December meant lights, decorations, gifts, family, and two weeks out of school. It was the most wonderful time fo the year.

But, as life transitioned from college graduation to marriage to children, an uneasiness swelled up in my heart as December approached. The things I enjoyed as an adolescent contributed to the storm of uneasiness as an adult. Parties. Gifts. Decorations. Even family outings were stressful, as we had to divide time between two families “appropriately” (whatever that means).

As a teenager, with no responsibilities, expectations surrounding Christmas were huge. Anticipation built as the calendar inched closer to Christmas Day. And the day never seemed to disappoint. As an adult, however, the anticipation and expectations always felt empty. Christmas day never lived up to its enormous billing. For several years, I battled a legitimate case of the “Christmas blues.”

Don’t get me wrong, I love watching my boys open gifts. It really is better to give than receive. But, after the presents were put away, I found myself alone, disappointed, thinking, “Surely there is more to Christmas than this.”

Three years ago, while bracing myself for another underwhelming holiday season, I discovered something that changed Christmas.
Advent.

I want to introduce you to the present that saved Christmas for me. I believe it will do the same for you.

What is Advent?

Advent is traditionally observed on the four Sundays leading up to Christmas. The word “Advent” simply means “arrival” or “coming.” For Christians, Advent refers to the arrival of Jesus Christ, God greatest gift to the world. For hundreds of years, God’s people waited eagerly for the Messiah. Then, in a small, sleepy town, in the most humble of circumstances, “the word became flesh.” The heavens opened, and God took the form of a man. The angels rejoiced! Emmanuel – God with us!

Today, much like the Israelites, we wait. Our hope is firmly placed in the inevitable return of Jesus. Advent is a time for remembering, rejoicing, watching, and holding to God’s promises.

Why should you observe Advent?

1.) Placing Jesus at the center of your holiday season adds meaning to everything else.

Family, gifts, decorations and holiday gatherings are shadows. Jesus is the substance. Shadows aren’t inherently bad. They are revealing. My shadow can tell you my presence is near. But my shadow is empty. If someone focuses on my shadow more than me, you would think they are stupid.

A similar thing happens during the holiday season. The events surrounding this season are good. For the most part. But they’re shadows. The joy of seeing family. The anticipation of Christmas day. These are shadows, designed to point you to the substance, Jesus Christ. If you focus more on the shadows than the substance, you won’t discover the fullness of this season. Jesus is the only one who can satisfy the weight of enormous expectations.

Observe Advent because it focuses on the substance, and adds meaning to the shadows.

2.) The demands surrounding this season can be overwhelming.

The increasing demands during the holiday season can be overwhelming. If you’re like me, you have something going on almost every night. Combining a packed schedule with life’s normal demands, and the result is often exhaustion and stress.

By the time the calendar flips to December 25th, you’re excited returned to the North Pole. You say, “I love the Christmas season, but I’m glad it’s over.”

What if you arrived at December 25th wanting more? Is it possible that your “I’m glad it’s over” attitude is a sign? It was for me. Advent focuses your thoughts around Jesus Christ, the only one who renews your tired heart and weary mind. Advent releases you from the burden of this season’s demands by aligning your sights on a manger, not a calendar.

3.) God can be trusted. His promises are always true. 

When you focus on the shadows of Christmas, you miss something huge. The promises of God are fulfilled in Jesus.

For all of God’s promises have been fulfilled in Christ with a resounding “Yes!” And through Christ, our “Amen” (which means “Yes”) ascends to God for his glory.1 Corinthians 1:20

Every promise finds its “yes” in Jesus. In other words, the birth of Jesus reminds you that every word of God is trustworthy. If God’s people could grasp this one reality, Satan wouldn’t have much of a kingdom on earth. If Christians could believe, I mean really believe, that EVERY word spoken from God is true, we would change the world. Overnight.

But if you’re like me, I read the promises in Scripture, I hear the promises from the pulpit, I pray the promises to God, but I don’t believe the promises. I don’t actually believe every word in Scripture is true. If so, I would let go of my comfort-driven, fear-controlled life. I would not care whether someone ridiculed me or killed me. To live would be gain and to die would be Christ. As it is, I wrestle with the promises, allowing my flesh to win most days.

Advent is about the arrival of Jesus. Emmanuel, “God with us.” Visible proof of a promise-keeping God. And, in a culture predicated on fear and a season driven by speed and materialism, we need this proof.

How do you place Jesus at the center of this season?

In case you missed the first link, here’s how to receive your free Advent daily devotional.

I know the transformative nature of Advent. I want you to experience a similar transformation. So, I created an Advent daily devotional guide. Everything you need to center your heart and mind around the substance of Christmas, Jesus Christ, is included in this guide.

This year’s theme is “Standing On The Promises.” If you sign up, you will receive a devotional every morning in your inbox, beginning November 29th, the first day of Advent (if you sign up after this day, you will receive your first devotional the following morning). Each day’s devo includes:

  1. A truth about God to guide your day
  2. Scriptures building on the day’s truth
  3. A reflection centered around the day’s truth and corresponding Scriptures
  4. A prayer as you prepare to transition into your day’s activities

In addition to the daily devotionals, each week has a theme undergirding the overall theme and tying together the daily readings.

Here are the weekly themes.

If you take a few minutes every day to soak in the divine truths of Christmas, I think God will do something amazing in your heart. Even if you love the holiday season the way it is, I challenge you to try Advent. I believe it will change how you see Jesus forever..

_______

We serve a promise-keeping God. And one day, in a moment, Jesus will return. This time, death, brokenness, sin, and Satan will be forever divorced from God and every person who loves Him.

Until then, we wait. But we don’t passively wait. We wait with eager expectation, anticipation, and hope. We serve a God who ALWAYS keep his promises. That’s a gift worth opening and proclaiming to others!

I love you all. To God be the glory forever! Amen.

Frank Powell is a blogger and a devoted follower of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.He is married to Tiffani Powell, also a passionate follower of Jesus. They have two children, Noah Riley Powell and Micah Grayson Powell. You may read the original article on his website at frankpowell.me.

 

Newborn baby found in nativity scene at New York City church

 

A newborn baby who still had his umbilical cord attached was found in a nativity scene at a Queens church on Monday.

The infant was abandoned at Holy Child Jesus Church in Richmond Hill and was discovered by a custodian around noon, according to police sources.

“The baby was found in the creche, a sort of manger scene where we would put the baby Jesus during Christmastime,” recalled the Rev. Christopher Heanue.

“The church is considered a safe haven for dropoffs,” he explained Tuesday. “The baby was brand new. He still had the umbilical cord attached. It’s a beautiful baby boy.”

Newborn baby found in nativity scene at Holy Child Jesus Church in Richmond Hill
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
The abandoned baby found in the manger at Holy Child Jesus Church in Richmond Hill.
Photo: Christopher Ryan Heanue

The child was later taken to Jamaica Hospital, sources said.

Surveillance video from Holy Child shows a woman walking inside with a baby in her arms and then shows her leaving without it.

The custodian who found the child left the church for about an hour and had heard him crying when he returned, according to sources.

“There are families within the parish who have inquired as to adopting the baby already,” Heanue said. “They feel that he was left in the parish and should stay in the parish.”

New York Post